Marshfield, Wis. Feb. 22nd.
1903
Index
Miss Florence Minch,
Naperville, Ill.
My dear friend:
You are certainly faithful to me far above
anything that I could expect. In fact Florence you have always
been very good to me, and now excuse me for my boldness in
expressing myself, and yet I ought not to be ashamed to say
what is true, but I have often wished, as I looked out towards
the darkness of Africa, that you could go with me and help to
lighten up that darkness. I could think of nothing more
beautiful, and more pleasant.
Now you have written to me for the third
time without a single answer. I would not be surprised if you
were beginning to think that I was drifting away from my
purpose to God, and losing my interest in His cause. I suppose
the Volunteer Band thinks of me once in a while, and wonders
how I am getting along. Surely I have often thought of you.
Yesterday I came home from the woods, and ate a hearty dinner
and then started back again. As I walked along wading the deep
snow, dressed in a heavy Mackinaw coat, large fur cap, heavy
mittens, and stout buckskin legins, with large pine trees
towering on either side of me, I felt so strong and vigorous,
that I almost jumped, just to see how high I could. I then
thought of my dear Africa, and my heart went up in praise to
God for his kindness in making me strong and healthy. My
thoughts then drifted off towards old North Western, and I
thought of our dear brother Weber. I remembered the trouble he
had last year with his health, and I said. Dear Jesus if it
please thee make Weber strong and healthy as Thou art making
me. When I came home last night the mail had just come in, and
I received your letter, and it made me sad to learn of Weber’s
misfortune. I have a great deal of respect for him, because I
believe he is a sincere young man. I have had many pleasant
talks with him since he joined our number. I wrote him a long
letter last night, and told him of some of my disappointments
and the blessings that have come from them, and perhaps he
will profit by some of my experiences.
I was certainly glad to hear that Mr
Butzbach has joined the Band. I am surprised that men of such
strong Christian character, should hold off so long. Last
Spring Term I was speaking with one of the leading Christian
young men of the college, and I told him of my experience in
Volunteering, and with tears in his eyes, he said he would
give anything in the world to be in my place. He said he knows
he must do the same thing but he cannot. I hope he will yet
conquer. I doubt not but what there are others who are
experiencing the same thing. May God give them courage to
decide for the right.
Now I suppose you will want to know what my
plans are for the future. I wish I could say that next Fall I
will be with you again. This morning I started to go to
church. I must walk 4 miles. Just as I left the house I took
out my watch, and it was just ten minutes of eight. The tears
ran down my cheeks, because I knew that you were gathering
together, and Oh how I wished I could meet with you, and what
made it still worse, I am afraid I shall never again be able
to meet with the Volunteer Band. I believe God is planning
otherwise for me. I have decided to stand on my own feet
hereafter. My parents have been very kind to me during the
past, and I suppose some of my friends will think I am foolish
when I say I believe I ought to cut loose from their support
in the future, but my dear father has written me some tings
which I know pained him, but he is too good not to let me know
the worst. I know nothing in the world would please him better
than to give me the best education possible, but he has now a
comfortable home for his old age, and in his present
circumstances can live comfortably, and as long as I have two
strong hands and God will give me a stout heart I dare not
detract in the least from that home. I have decided to lean
entirely upon my Master, and trust Him for all. My father has
promised to help me, but the sacrifice will be too great for
him, for me to dare to accept it. I praise my Master that he
has given me strong hands, and strong feet, and a willing
heart to reach the heathen field, rather than gold and silver.
In fact it is sweet to be as poor as he was, and yet depend
upon his riches. The beginning of the 3rd verse of
the old Hymn Jesus I my cross have taken is only too true.
“Go then earthly fame and treasure
Come disaster scorn and
pain
In thy service pain is
pleasure
With thy favor loss is
gain.”
I wish you would read the entire song. It
is very dear to me. I have learned it all by heart the 6
verses. Some books have only three. I have written to Mr J.
Davis Adams, Secretary of the Africa Inland Mission concerning
my purpose, and what was my surprise to find in his letter
answering mine, the very first words were “I feel like saying
Hallelujah”. He said that now I am in a position to follow my
Master. If it please God I shall remain here until the 1st
of August, then I will go to St Paul, and visit my brothers,
and then I shall go home for a while, and then go to
Philadelphia where the Africa Inland Mission have their
training school for missionaries. There I shall engage in
Bible study, do city Mission Work and Hospital work. I will
remain there until God sees fit to send me out to the field,
which may be soon. I have met some disappointments in the
past, and may in the future, but it is through disappointments
that God leads on to victory.
Now I hope you will not leave off writing
to me because it may be that I can not be with you again. I am
always yearning to hear something from the old place I have
learned to love so well. Those volunteer Band Meetings have
been an aching void in my heart since I have left them. I
remember the last meeting I could not keep from shedding tears
freely, and it seemed as though I knew it would be my last. Oh
that I had been in those meetings sooner. For more than a year
I was in college holding back from duty, and the loss I shall
probably never know. If that little Band could be set in the
heart of Africa there would be no greater joy for me than to
join it. I shall always remember those few names with a holy
reverence. May God join you who are left into an ever closer
fellowship. If any of you should choose Africa for a field I
should rejoice to know it.
Now I hope you will write to me, and let me
know all in detail. Some things that may seem small and
insignificant, are just the things I want to know. I hope you
will excuse me for writing on Sunday, but you know here we
have no place to go, and Sunday afternoons are so long, and I
have written now just to pass time away, and after all for me
to write a letter to a dear friend is just as pleasant and as
profitable as to engage in conversation, and if you had been
here, I don’t think you would have thought that it was wrong
to tell you what I have written. Give my best regards to all
fellow Volunteers. I shall continue to remember you in my
prayers, and I know you will think of me,
Your fellow worker in our Master’s cause
John W. Stauffacher.
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